The Sister and I have taken to having late-night sleepover-type conversations.
“Look at the state of this Eeyore,” she said the other night as we were lying on my bed discussing The Future. She held up my bedraggled cuddly toy in some disgust.
“It’s fine,” I said somewhat defensively. “He’s seven years old and I’ve cuddled him every night of those seven years.”
“Hails,” said Sister sternly, “He has no hair, and his eyes are yellow.”
“I’m not washing him!” I exclaimed panickily. “Red put him in the washing machine once. I cried. I sat there for the entire duration of the wash, watching him go round and round, all scared and wet.”
“You should give him to Mum,” advised The Sister, seriously. “No, really,” she continued with great enthusiasm, “she’s magic. I don’t know what she does to them, but they come out looking better than brand new.”
I raised a suspicious eyebrow.
Sister was insistent. “I left Teddy there once,” she explained passionately. “He went in looking terrible. He didn’t even have both arms, and his fur was all matted. I came back the next day, and there he was, sitting on the sofa, upright and proud to be alive. Honestly, I don’t know how she did it. I think she even made him a new bib, but it looked exactly like the old one.”
“I don’t want Eeyore going in the washing machine!” I reiterated with some force. “He’ll fall to bits. He’s already lost his tail.”
“No, no,” said The Sister, eagerly, “you really can trust her. I mean, I had Teddy’s arm in a bag.”
“Good grief,” I murmured despairingly. Sister ignored me. “I’m telling you, they come out looking re-stuffed, fully-limbed, and completely re-fluffed! She’s, I dunno, some kind of teddy miracle worker.”
We pause for a moment in admiration of Mum.
Filed under: advice, animal cruelty, conversations, decisions, Eeyore, family, Fear, parents, sad, teddy bear, worry
If you sent me to your mum would I come back looking and feeling better than new? I want. Iwant!
Happy Easter Hails to you and Sister.
eeyore in the washing machine, that was so funny! to be fair though, he was really smelly at the time.
Grannymar – you look brand new already!
Paul – Big bully.
Go on give him to mum, just for one day….you’ll see!!!!
He looks sooooooooo sad!
But… but… eeyore is supposed to be sad and grumpy and smelly with his tail pinned on instead of stitched! It’s just his way!
I can’t bear (sorry) to watch teddies on a spin cycle.
Yep, I agree with K8 – Eeyore looking “upright and proud to be alive” makes no sense!!!
It does make sense…if only you could see him now
he is more sad than any eeyore should ever be…!!!
Wash him…wash him…wash him……..!!
How do you know your mum didn’t just buy The Sister a new Teddy that looked exactly like the old one?
I have to say, I didn’t realise this would be such a controversial issue.