Saw this over at Bevchen‘s. It’s a finish-the-sentences meme, and it gave me the inspiration I needed to actually write a post today…
1. My uncle once: shared the spiked hair and general appearance of the young Gary Barlow, and entertained us by crooning A Million Lovesongs into a microphone (or, erm, the phone handset) every time he came over.
2. Never in my life: have I been attacked by insects as much as I have in Belgium. The bitemarks are getting bigger and more gruesome by the day.
3. When I was five: I won a Harriet Hippo tea set from Twinkle Comic For Little Girls. I was so proud. I kept the clipping with the list of winners for years, bringing it out occasionally to look at my name in print.
4. High school was: at times terrible, at other times fantastic. I think everyone would say the same!
5. I will never forget: the feeling of sheer joy when I finally passed my driving test after far too much trying.
6. Once I met: Cobra from Gladiators. He was… like a perfectly sculpted work of art.
7. There’s this girl I know: who, at 40 years old, has only a couple of years left to live. She is the smiliest, happiest, sunniest person I have ever had the pleasure of being around, and I have not once heard her complain about anything. Makes you think.
8. Once, at a bar: I got pushed over and trampled in a crowd surge… at a guest appearance from Tyrone Tom from Big Brother. Rockin’.
9. By noon, I’m usually: thinking about getting up. I’m a night person, me.
10. Last night: I booked my fiver-a-time flights to Hungary and Sweden in the Ryanair sale, taught the parrot to say “Bout ye?”, acquired 7 new mosquito bites, had a very confusing conversation, and lay awake until 4am trying to switch my brain off.
11. If only I had: left my purse at home when I went out on Bastille Day.
12. Next time I go to church: will be when I’ve gotten over the last time.
13. What worries me most: running out of money and having to abandon my travels.
14. When I turn my head left I see: lots of houseplants, office furniture, and one of those big exercise balls that Dwight had in The Office.
15. When I turn my head right I see: the window, and through it, lots of trees. I am living beside a forest. Which kind of explains the insect problem…
16. You know I’m lying when: you somehow find out the truth.
17. What I miss most about the Eighties is: Secret bars and Grotbags.
18. If I were a character in Shakespeare I’d be: Portia from The Merchant of Venice.
19. By this time next year: my body will be unrecognisable because of all the mosquito bites.
20. A better name for me would be: ….. I don’t know how to answer this. I’m sure some people could think of less than flattering names for me! But I’m quite content to be a Hayley, and I love being called Hails.
21. I have a hard time understanding: facts and figures, people who spend their lives arguing about politics, the book of Revelation, how anyone can drink coffee with sugar in it, Dutch, modern art, violence.
22. If I ever go back to school, I’ll: worry less about exam results. I’ve realised now how little they actually meant. I could be doing what I’m doing now without ever having passed a single GCSE.
23. You know I like you if: I tell you so. Or hug you. Or give you a compliment.
24. If I ever won an award, the first person I would thank would be: the people who voted for me to have the award. And then my parents, because everyone thanks their parents, and also because they’re probably reading this. :)
25. Take my advice, never: assume that a parrot won’t attack you just because you love all animals.
26. My ideal breakfast is: bagels… oh how I miss bagels. Bagels with cream cheese and smoked salmon, maybe some scrambled eggs on the side… strong coffee… orange juice… served on a tray, in bed, with a little flower in a tiny vase. In reality, I have a croissant or a slice of toast, usually whilst sorting out my work schedule for the day.
27. A song I love but do not have is: … pretty much any song that I love. I don’t ‘have’ any music nowadays. Can’t carry CDs around, and can’t afford downloads. I make do with radio and YouTube videos!
28. If you visit my hometown, I suggest you: become familiar with roundabout etiquette.
29. Why won’t people: just get along?
30. If you spend a night at my house: I’ll be intrigued, since I don’t have one.
31. I’d stop my wedding for: Robert Downey Junior. Or some sort of natural disaster.
32. The world could do without: mosquitoes. I don’t like to keep harping on about it, but seriously. What do they contribute to the world, besides pain, itching, disease and torment?
33. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: have dozens of them crawling all over me.
34. My favourite blonde(s) is/are: McBouncy.
35. Paper clips are more useful than: mosquitoes. Oh, and my bank’s “helpline”.
36. If I do anything well it’s: attracting disaster. Falling over, losing things (including myself), getting into confusing situations and predicaments. Comes naturally to me!
37. I can’t help but: dance when I hear New Soul or It’s My Life.
38. I usually cry: at sad films, or when someone’s angry with me.
39. My advice to my child/nephew/niece: be careful: the world is full of insects. And don’t start smoking.
40. And by the way: Belgium isn’t very sunny after all.