Having decided to part with the huge disappointment that was my shiny new iPad, i found a buyer just downstairs. Alex and I made a trade – an iPad and an old laptop in exchange for some cash and a Nintendo Wii with Wii Fit.
I don’t understand! I connected it all up and all the wires are in the right place and everything, and it still won’t work, I wailed despairingly down the phone as I sat in a sea of cables and boxes. Alex responded with the typical male question: Did you plug it in?
Yes, I plugged it in, I told him sharply (burrowing hurriedly through the mess to the wall socket in order to confirm this). He issued a few more instructions before giving up and plodding dutifully up the stairs to sort it out. He looked with interest at the whole set-up, no doubt admiring my tech-savviness, and bent down to inspect the Wii. There was a sudden beep and the Wii logo appeared as if by magic on my TV screen.
Wow! I exclaimed, both impressed and annoyed by his superior knowledge. How did you do that?!
He informed me that he’d pressed the “power on” button.
Why must I be such a girl despite all my best efforts?
Anyway, I got started with creating my Mii. She had long dark hair, glasses, blue eyes, pale skin… truly a cute cartoon version of myself. Then I had to do a body test before I began training, and the Wii freaked out a bit. Although everything is in Korean, I could tell that it was extremely unhappy with me simply by its tone of voice and all the exclamation marks. It informed me that my Wii Fit Age was 41 (!), and my Mii hung her head in shame. Then it told me I was obese, and suddenly my cute little Mii morphed into this huge barrel-shaped creature, so fat that her arms now stick out slightly from her sides, and instead of running on to the menu screen, she sort of… waddles. I didn’t know whether to be insulted or amused, but I suppose I’ll know I’m starting to lose weight and tone up when my Mii looks less like Buddha on a cheeseburger diet.
I have commenced the fitness regime.
I’ve discovered that although I hate step aerobics, I love it when it takes the form of a dance mat style of game. Although I detest running, I enjoy it when my running motions are controlling a computerised character on cute cartoon island. Although I have terrible balance, I like practising yoga with an animated instructor who is patient with me until I get it right. I think I have finally found an exercise programme that works for me – and the best part is that I don’t have to pack a gym kit, travel to a leisure centre, or be all red and sweaty in public (well, any more so than usual, I mean). And as someone who gets bored and discouraged unless I can see results, having the Wii track my daily progress, weight loss, BMI, and exercise sessions on graphs and charts is a huge incentive.
I love it! And who knows, maybe my super-sized Mii will be a Wee Mii before long.
Filed under: Uncategorized