Fresh Art

Upon closer inspection, it appears that the Drainpipe Art I mentioned the other day is actually more bizarre than any of us could have expected.

“Hang on,” I said as we walked past it again. Crossing the street to have a closer look at this architectural wonder, I peered closely at the ‘cups’. A feeling of utter bewilderment crept in over my mild bemusement. In silence, I crouched down to examine the display of pipes on the base of the ‘Art’.

Unable to do anything other than gape, I glanced up at Riho, who was no doubt anxiously awaiting my verdict. “These are… air fresheners,” I said slowly and carefully. I returned my gaze to the pipes in order to verify this. I nodded. “They are, in fact, air fresheners” I confirmed, unable to tear myself away from the ‘Art’.

Not only is it a model made of drainpipes, and not only is it bizarrely decorated with cups of some description, but it is also an exhibit of air fresheners. I do not know what to make of this, and there is no descriptive literature to be found. In a moment of desperation, I almost asked a girl standing nearby, until I realised that she was just an interested observer like myself and had nothing to do with the ‘Art’. I cannot cope with the Not Knowing; there is a deep, inexplicable need in me to find meaning. Other people may be able to walk past and say “Oh look, dear, a large object made of drainpipes and decorated with cups and two types of air freshener, how lovely!”, but I simply can’t do that. I had to leave eventually, as the fumes were giving me a headache and the lavender scent was making me sneeze, but I haven’t let it go.

I won’t.

Pancakes, ‘Art’ and… erm, sex shows.

Whoop-whoop! I’ve found another pancake place. I should really make some effort to take control of this situation before I get to France, or Crêpe Land as I suspect it’s also known. Otherwise I’ve probably developed an obsession that’s going to have just as great a hold over me as smoking is capable of having. Pancake Dependence. Not good. I think I’ve consumed more pancakes since moving to Estonia than I’ve eaten in the rest of my entire life until this point.

Anyway, my main reason for mentioning Kompressor was not to rave on like a madwoman about the joys of savoury filled pancakes (mushroom and blue cheese saturated with garlic, though… mmm…. and I never told you about the mashed potato, onion and bacon one I had in Bann Cook the other week…), but by way of introduction to more things I’ve spotted that could rightfully fall under the heading of Rather Odd. Over the page from the pancakes on the Kompressor menu, for example, were the drinks and other extras:

I wondered aloud if it would count as smoking if I ordered the cigarettes from the menu and treated them as a dessert. According to Riho and his raised eyebrow, it would. Anyway, all thoughts of cigarettes disappeared from my mind when we passed an art exhibit in the street. Unfortunately I didn’t get a picture of one we saw the other day, which consisted of two life-sized dummies dressed in black and wearing scary masks, suspended from a crane of some description. And a bored woman in the corner of the room, apparently supervising. Art, you see. I’ve no idea what this one’s meant to be, or do, or say. I couldn’t ask anyone, because my Estonian still isn’t quite fluent enough. To me, it looks like a large model made of drainpipes, adorned with cups.

It is, however, Art, and therefore must be respected. What do I know?

And let’s not overlook this poster for The X Club, which happened to catch my eye as we passed it in the street. I looked at it in some concern. “What?” asked Riho, realising I’d stopped walking. I continued to stare at the poster. “This poster just gets more and more alarming the further down it you read,” I said nervously. I have decided not to visit The X Club. Despite the fact that ‘ladies’ apparently get in for half price, I’m not sure I want to know what a Bizarre Show or Water Show might involve.